Occupy Wall Street, Vegans!

Okay, so I have made a commitment to preserve the rights of vegans and vegetarians everywhere to eat what they like, as I would hope they'd also allow me the right to eat bacon wrapped hot dogs on the 4th of July. Anyway, what I can't figure out is what all this Occupy Wall Street stuff is all about and how the vegans have mustered enough energy to participate.

So I'm with it enough to understand that meat is too inexpensive for the environmental costs, that its price is understated due to government corn subsidies, and that the entity benefitting from these subsidies is not the farmer or the consumer (or the government) but the industrial-scale food production machine. But I don't really pay attention to politics.

Anyway, the Occupy Wall Street general assembly is asking for donations. You can contribute money, showers and laundry services and of course, food. On their donation page, they identify eateries from which you can order food for occupants. You can order from Panini & Co. at 115 Broadway in Manhattan, but note: "Please try to focus on vegan and vegetarian options..." So I'm not exactly a puppet for big business nor do I stand with the 1%, but really? Order your own damn vegan panini.

All foods are not created equal, but it is a privilege to demand which foods you will and will not eat. But gosh darn it, I'm hungry for a vegan panini now!

As a post script, PETA has joined the fight, donating vegan pizzas. A person in a chicken suit is "representing the 100 percent of animals raised for food in the U.S."

the vegans are attacking

Hide your vegetables and soy-based meat substitutes, the vegans are attacking! Their weapons, judging looks and indignant comments like "Yeah, so I'm vegan." Lucky for you, they are not very well organized and tire easily for lack of calories.

Michael has several close friends who are practicing vegans. Generally, I enjoy their company because I never accept their invitations to dinner. When they stand next to Michael they make him look fat, which is funny. They know their way around obscure, delicious vegetables and often have pleasant-smelling breath. Here is a story about one of these vegans:

Cheap Date

If it was not for the plant-based nature of distilled, brewed and fermented beverages perhaps I would never have the chance to meet a vegan. I'd point to someone walking by, and I'd say, "Is that a vegan?" and someone would politely correct me, "Sanchez, I think she is a meth addict." My mistake. Luckily, alcoholic beverages are not distilled from beef (the very idea is untenable) and vegans seem happy to drink with me. Michael and I were drinking one night with our vegan friend Bradley. Bradley made the decision to go vegan years ago when he read some book he never stops talking about. We realized that we hadn't eaten, and a few friends ushered us into a nearby Italian restaurant. We promptly ordered more wine. Michael and I shared a carpaccio, pasta and something else. I can't remember. Michael and I were really digging the carpaccio and offered Bradley a bite. He declined my offer until I offered to pay for his dinner if he took one bite. Perhaps every vegan has a price, but that bite of carpaccio makes Bradley a cheap date.

Thank you to our friends at The Garden Vegan Cafe in Walla Walla for the unexpectedly delicious lunch. We wish you great success even though I'll still go across the street for my favorite pulled pork sandwich. Just being honest.