rejoice!

The result of the election spread sadness all over the country. With hearts full of despair, we may be facing a future filled with whatever canned or non-parishable foods we can fit into our zombie-proof fallout shelter where we will await the Obama Socialist apocalypse.

White ladies sad about Romney's loss, sadness unmatched even when they
found out there wouldn't be a new Neimam Marcus in Boca Raton.

In the mean time we can enjoy a HETEROSEXUAL chicken sandwich at Chic-Fil-A, the country's most popular traditional chicken outlet. Thankfully, stores are still opening! Republicans rejoice, and take some solace before the world comes collapsing at our feet.

Thank you to "White People Mourning Romney," the brilliant, topical blog which brought this important news to our attention.